the Power of the Popular (or Post-Modern) Poz Paradigm


You must believe me despite what you think: i am not judging, but am not going to infect you, either. HIV meds aren't cheap, even with health coverage. Not to mention how often they don't work or stop working.

OK, wait. Actually, I lied. I judge. Everyone does. Constantly. It is what separates humans from all other creatures. Judgment. Free will. It's good stuff, not bad, not negative. Judgment isn't the same as feeling guilt or shame.

Read on. Mind, open, just for a bit, OK?

Wasted viagra? What is this blog all about anyway?

This is my blog which is a record of some of the more outrageous postings I have seen on the Craigslist Personals\M4M section, where guys who are supposedly HIV-negative are looking for bareback tops who are also supposedly HIV-negative.

When I read one of these ads (and there are many, every day, in every small and large city in the country), and feel particularly incensed, and think that I might be able to reach that person in some small way by telling them my experiences with how that has worked out for so many people doing what they are doing, then I go ahead and write them, and post their original ad, as well as my email to them, to my blog. It makes me feel better about seeing all those ads, at least trying to get them to stop the insanity, or, at least, admit to them that I don't know their situation, that maybe their ability to at least specify that they want an HIV-negative partner is already a big step for them, that for some people they actually have taken much time and thought a lot about how they are going to approach sex and dating and for some of them, it is an acceptable risk to play, even bareback, with people who at least are declaring themselves HIV-negative.

Some of these people do realize that it is akin Russian Roulette with varying odds. Some of them think that at least they are upping their odds by "only barebacking" with guys who at least identify as HIV-negative. I don't know if the statistic is still correct of 50% of the HIV-infected population in the US being unaware, but if that is the case, the odds still aren't great for these guys. It is very very risky and a very effective way to become infected with HIV, this whole "UB2" world.

I can't say that I know anything about it, either, and I admit that to them, because I have been HIV+ for longer than I was HIV-. Born 1964, infected 1983, you do the math. :-)

L'auteur, c'est moi

My photo
Palm Springs, CA, United States
You must believe me despite what you think: i am not judging, but am not going to infect you, either. HIV meds aren't cheap, even with health coverage. Not to mention how often they don't work or stop working. OK, wait. Actually, I lied. I judge. Everyone does. Constantly. It is what separates humans from all other creatures. Judgment. Free will. It's good stuff, not bad, not negative. Judgment isn't the same as feeling guilt or shame. Read on. Mind, open, just for a bit, OK?

Monday, June 18, 2007

Are *all* the homo baseball enthusiasts flakes, or . . .

I responded to a message on San Diego Craigslist in the "strictly platonic" m4m category. The message was posted by a guy who claimed to be looking for a baseball friend, someone to go to Padres games with. We had coffee and talked about games we wanted to go to together. Not sure if I was too young too tall too what for him, but after making plans to go to a game "soon", I think his nuts must have fallen off, cuz the flake didn't man up and say what happened, he just bought some Kotex & headed for the ladies' room at Petco.

Then some other dude posted a message on the same area of Craigslist seeking a casual buddy to go to baseball games with. He said he'd be up for watching games on his big screen TV together, too. But his words were completely meaningless as well.

Man, these dudes that go to such lengths to get their jollies are *free KEY*!!. Or is this just merely typical and expected San Diego homo BS? I'm still new to town, so I don't know. This nonsense wasn't even about dating (a complete encyclopedia of absurdities available at your local independent bookshop soon). It's about finding a person to get into a hobby with. For fukx sake, guys. Grow a pair and keep this in mind:

Say what you mean. And mean what you say. If you can't do that, don't say it.

If by chance you did say something, and can't keep your word, have a pinch of integrity: communicate that.

It will do wonders for your mood and sense of self-worth. If you don't know what "self-worth" is, just take a leap of faith and try this integrity exercise once or twice. You might find out what "self-worth" means at long last.

Who am I, besides the terse sports fan with the astringent pen & the extra time to use it liberally? I'm a recent transplant from all points up & down the West coast. A David Schwimmer lookalike, I hear all the time, intelligent, easy going, professional, educated, and really want to go to a baseball game before the season is over, and would rather not go alone. But I will, most likely, because the all-too-common abuse of good faith & serious activity-mate seekers amuses me not.

So, if someone is able to follow through with what they say, write me and we can connect and see about it.

Thanks,
Posted by at

No comments:

Post a Comment

Subscribe to: Post Comments (Atom)